Staff Pix 10/6: Our Cover Bands

The Milk Crate staff is getting the band back together! Below are their picks for what they’d play in their very own cover bands, presented with blurbs worthy of a promotional sticker on a jewel case. Tune in Fridays from 3-4PM EST to the Staff Pix radio show.

Salem Ross

“Sleeping In The Hallway” by Mirror Kisses, George Clanton

If it doesn't sound like a confession gone awry, it's not for me. My knees hit the floor mid-chorus, chords being tangled over my hands and the mic being clutched until the truth was over with. There is no better album than Bad Dreams and no better song than “Sleeping In The Hallway” by Mirror Kisses. There have been a few instances where I have said the words to this track, specifically the second verse, with something overtaking me, turning the song into some prophetic scripture. Sounding like an 80s throwaway track, this 2012 bandcamp charting hit just does it for a moment of passion in cover bands.

Lia Klug

“Poker Face” by The Glee Cast

I’m aware that this is already a cover and while I love this song as originally performed by Miss Gaga, my cover band is performing this song a la Rachel Berry and Idina Menzel. Sort of a cover of a cover if you will. This version of the song is so good my performance would be a vain attempt to get more people to listen to it. When I was younger my mom burned a CD of literally just this performance of the song and 8 year old me sang along to every word with the passion of a woman with nothing left to give. Listen to Idina Menzel belt “Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun And, baby, when it's love, if it ain't rough, it isn't fun” and tell me your life isn’t changed.

Karenna Umscheid

“Rhinestone Cowboy” by Glen Campell

The only form of therapy I have invested in has been scream-singing in my car. I know that this is an issue, but do not despair as I am currently in the process of finding a real therapist! But over the summer, the speakers in my Honda Accord (shoutout!) worked so well to heal the gaps in my soul. This karaoke passion, tied to the middle-aged dad energy I proudly carry, means that as a cover artist I feel like I could enrapture Eras-level crowds with a cover of “Rhinestone Cowboy” by Glen Campbell. I am a middle-aged man in so many ways, from my collection of Bruce Springsteen CDs to my encyclopedic Martin Scorsese knowledge, my love for the most obscure of Stephen King’s stories, and my devotion to rewatching Point Break as often as possible. My psyche carries with me the same demons that a life of being a man would, and my emotional plights will allow me to carry the same soul that Campbell did in “Rhinestone Cowboy.” A smile is always hiding all the pain, but I am gonna be where the lights are shining on me! The only thing I’m missing is a horse and the ability to ride a horse, but besides that, I love fun cowboy hats and boots, and lots of multicolored rhinestones. I am the rhinestone cowboy.

Shreya Partha

“Love at First sight” by The Brobecks

I have never been a fan of childish melodies. Yet, despite this, The Brobecks manage to make this song something to lend an ear to. The light instrumentals in the background perfectly mirror the feeling of being in love—floaty, spacey and a little fast paced in the best way. The lyricism of the song also encapsulates lust at first sight in that there isn’t much to be said and anything there is to say is soon forgotten or eventually repeated. They sing, “Could this be love at first sight / Oh wait, I said that before,” displaying an all too relatable feeling of tripping over our own words or forgetting what we have or haven’t said in the presence of someone infatuating. It’s one of those songs that’s so universally understandable yet so fun to sing and play along to that it would simply be a disservice to not have my cover band perform it.

Sage Liebowitz

“Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne

The year is 2010. Seven-year-old Sage is clutching the Wii remote in her small, sweaty hand, heart racing as she takes the living room stage for her favorite performance from Just Dance 2 - “Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne. The amount of times she’s done this is infinite, but it still hits her every time. It was always her dream to be a rockstar, which is actually why she got her ears pierced in the first place after looking in the mirror and saying, “Ya know what the final piece of the puzzle is? Having killer earrings for the stage.” Even today, her biggest regret is not learning how to play the electric guitar. So, after head-banging as a kid to this absolutely brutal, incredible song that wasn’t exactly appropriate for a seven-year-old, I want to dance around a stage much grander than my living room and scream my face off to lyrics that weren’t even written for me. That’s what being a rockstar is all about, right?

Gabriella Collin

“Everything She Wants” by Wham!

Do you remember the scene in La La Land where Ryan Gosling begrudgingly plays keys for an ‘80s cover band? He dons a red windbreaker rolled up at the elbows, to indicate that he is better than this. Well, I’m not. Give me the budget and the skills, I would be all over this song. I certainly have the earrings for it. This song maintains its iconic status thanks to its catchy, synthy nature. My favorite set of lines is “But one step further and my back will break / If my best isn’t good enough / Then how can it be good enough for two?” A few stanzas later he proclaims, “My god, I don’t even know if I love you!” He delivers the line as if he's coming to this realization as he says it. It's no surprise that this song was popular on TikTok a few months ago to accompany a makeup trend, but for those of us with bootleg, Make it Big (1984) CD’s, I’ll always look for this song on jukeboxes first.

Ellie Abbey

“Head Over Heels” by Tears For Fears

From those very first notes, nearly anyone gets that signature on-top-of-the-world feeling that Tears for Fears offers throughout their discography. Despite the range in this song, it’s surprisingly easy and gratifying to belt out. That combined with the stylized instrumentals for every instrument makes this a fun experience for any member of the band (except maybe the drummer…gotta love a rock beat). The keyboardist gets to take the lead on the melody, the bassist gets to actually play more than a couple notes a verse, and the guitarist gets as many egocentric solos as they make room for. There’s even the clapping and ‘ah’ and ‘la’ segment at the end allowing for anyone in the audience to join in. As someone who could be in any one of those positions, I see this song as nothing but a good time.

Izzy Desmarais

“Losing My Religion” by R.E.M.

Fun fact: my dad plays guitar in a cover band and “Losing My Religion” is one of the songs in their rotation. If you’re reading this and you live in southeastern Massachusetts, check out Pink Granite on Facebook! This summer, I discovered the magic that is R.E.M.’s discography and I owe it entirely to my dad’s rendition of their iconic single. When “Losing My Religion” comes on, I can’t help but dance. The mandolin riff is infectious, and after the track plays through once, I immediately have to press rewind. Although its lyrics illustrate a vulnerable picture of unrequited love, the title invites religious readings. As lead singer Michael Stipe points out in an episode of Netflix’s Song Exploder, “There were places where people were questioning organized religion and questioning the Catholic church, and this song meant something very different in Ireland, for instance, in 1991. It became almost a protest song to some people who were questioning what power religion had over us.” It speaks to how exceptional songwriters and musicians the members of R.E.M. are—the ability to create such a pervasive piece of art that continues to stand the test of time is a thing to behold. Even though I’m not in a cover band, I sing this song while in the shower as if I’m standing on stage, so that must count for something.

Amelia Oei

“Take Me Away” by Lash

Last week my sister called, informing me that she had begun learning the guitar solo from “Take Me Away” by the band Pinkslip. Though excited, I wondered how; the band itself was made up, the lead guitarist being Lindsay Lohan in the Disney classic Freaky Friday. Upon doing some research, however, I found that the famously unrecorded song actually is recorded — originally by the Australian alt-rock/punk band Lash. Though Lash’s version is missing Lohan's powerful guitar solo that undoubtedly inspired many young viewers to beg their parents for guitar lessons (yes, I was one of said kids), it is still full of fun, raging angst that will make anyone want to sing along. I sent the newfound Lash song back to my sister and brother; I’ve already begun learning the bass tabs. There is no doubt that our three-person band will cover this song when I go home for break.

Bianca Cormier

“Don’t Let Me Down” by The Beatles

Queer. Beatles. Rock. Cover. Band. And I’m John Lennon.

But seriously, don’t you see it.  That cry “Nobody ever loved me like she does / Ooh, she does,” that blues feel. It captures that feeling of longing and hesitation at the beginning of the end—one that can only be made sense of by rasping this song out. Lennon's soulful vocals and that rooftop fashion is one I need to see for myself, why not be it? Fur coats and bell bottomed jeans, hair blowing in the wind, my queer cover band will hit the rooftops near you.

Stephanie Weber

“Rio” by Duran Duran

“Rio” by Duran Duran is the perfect song for a cover band (that rhymes, just like Duran Duran writes their songs). It’s an epic 80s ballad, but in this cover band, it would be turned from an epic European dance song to that of a longing piano cover (think Glee’s emotional second cover of “Teenage Dream”). “Rio” becomes a love song for the ages, then—an intimate portrayal of love in paradise. The song details presumably a man looking for his love; a flirty woman who lives with no regrets. She’s in her own world, an “80s manic pixie dream girl” of sorts. This male protagonist, though, has his eyes set on her, despite her elusive and mysterious aura. Duran Duran sings the lyrics, “And when she shines, she really shows you all she can” and “Cherry ice cream smile” to describe this girl. This is a pure love song if you can imagine this cover band singing it acoustic and maybe between two lead singers, one man and one woman. They would harmonize the lyrics, “I'll take my chance 'cause luck is on my side,” looking at each other knowing that destiny brought them together. Duran Duran closes the song with the lyrics, “Her name is Rio, she don't need to understand / And I might find her if I'm looking like I can.” This is heart wrenching stuff. English New Wave tunes aside, “Rio” is timeless and could be fitted for any occasion.

Monika Krueger

“Don’t Speak” by No Doubt

I know what I’m thinking, and I’ll tell you all my reasons: “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt is a song whose confrontational angst, timeless turmoil, and scream-ability —for lack of a better term—makes it an obvious and instant pick for my hypothetical cover band. Vocalist Gwen Stefani shifts between an assertive, almost angry acceptance of a failing relationship (“Don’t speak / I know what you’re thinkin’ / And I don’t need your reasons”) to an uncertain sort of denial (“I can see us dyin’ / Are we?”). The repeated—and seemingly desperate—demands for the person that’s wronged them to, well, not speak, is simultaneously a fuck-you and a refusal to face heartbreak; every “Hush, hush darlin’” it is as badass as it is devastating. Don’t tell me because I don’t want to give you a space to redeem yourself, and don’t tell me because I can’t accept the fact that we’re through. It’s an emotional mess meant to be screamed by any young person, AKA the young person in my imagined cover band. Alas, “It’s all ending / I gotta stop pretending / Who we are”: the narrator has to stop pretending that the relationship can be saved, and I have to stop pretending that I will ever have a cover band.

Julia Norkus

“We Used To Be Friends” by The Dandy Warhols

The nasty, biting undertones of The Dandy Warhols’s 2003 hit “We Used to be Friends” have had a chokehold on me since the summer my mom and I watched every season of Veronica Mars. Recently, I dressed up to go to The Front Bottoms' concert at Roadrunner and my outfit screamed ‘00s dirtbag boyfriend; I wore a stupid black tee shirt, black Dickies, a black belt, beat up converse, which some may consider the uniform of a male manipulator. Maybe it’s just me, but sometimes it’s hot to look like a greasy scumbag. So to cover The Dandy Warhols in a smokey basement as the lead singer of a shitty college band with a cigarette hanging from my lips as I scream to a crowd of moshing 20-somethings would probably be the epitome of gender euphoria. The song itself is sung in the style of breathy whispers and explosive whines during the chorus, which all demand the attention of an audience. Needless to say, I’d serenade you any day with “We Used to be Friends,” even if you keep asking me to stop mansplaining guitar pedals to you.

Malia Welham

“Add It Up” by Violent Femmes

“Add It Up” has a special place in my heart. It is a track I regularly listened to this summer on the way home from the gym, banging on any surface I could find, in order to match the driving rhythms of the drums. I have a firm belief that my love for imaginary and impromptu performances stems from the countless nights of playing Guitar Hero with my family as a child. The prevalence of tone deafness and lack of musical inclination made our living room performances easily resemble that of a punk house show. Together we stiffly played the toy instruments and sang terribly off key, completely destroying all musical standards. For this reason, I am certain my family would make an amazing punk cover band, and in honor of my dad, “Add It Up” would have to be the first song we perform. I remember him telling me he enjoyed listening to the Violent Femmes when he was “young and angry at the world.” A statement I find humorous but also quite endearing as it is helping me come to terms with the fact I do not get to be an angsty teenager forever. Just as I have had to come to terms with the fact I am no longer that little girl performing for a fake audience in my living room.

Madison Smithwick

“Hold it now, Hit It” by Beastie boys

The Beastie Boys are the best band of all time (at least according to me). My friends and I consider ourselves their biggest fans. We all have Paul’s Boutique (1989) shirts, Check Your Head (1992) stickers, even dressed up as the band in their music video for Hello Nasty (1998) single “Intergalactic.” However, our favorite song is off their debut album Licensed to Ill (1986). “Hold It Now, Hit It” was produced by Rick Rubin, and got the group noticed before their smash hit “Fight For Your Right.” Ever since we heard the song, we've always made it a mission to listen to it when we hangout. Now, it’s evolved to the point where we rap the song loudly for everyone in the neighborhood to hear. Since we’re a trio, I rap MCA’s lines, one raps Ad-Rock’s, and the other Mike D. We got the talent to be a Beastie Boys cover band, now all we need is a platform. Weddings, birthday parties, baby showers, bat / bar mitzvahs, even corporate functions. Hit us up.

Lily Suckow Ziemer

“Kol Nidrei - Adagio for Cello, Opus 47” by Max Bruch

The only instrument I can play is cello, so my cover band would probably be more of an orchestra. Cellos usually take a backseat though, so I’ve selfishly chosen “Kol Nidrei - Adagio For Cello, Opus 47” by German composer of the Romantic period, Max Bruch. The ten minute and forty-eight seconds long piece starts off extremely slow, the instruments just a whisper in your ear. As the cello’s presence slowly grows you can feel every note in your chest like a heartbeat. The cello, which is, in my opinion, the most underappreciated string instrument, really has an opportunity to show off its range, using the whole finger board. I don’t self-identify as a classic music listener, but “Kol Nidrei” is so beautiful it makes me feel like crying.

Bennett Himmel

“This Is What Makes US Girls” by LanA Del Rey

As a 9 or 10 year old, I spent my evenings wandering around the now-closed Newbury Comics asking for recommendations and eventually they recommended Lana Del Rey’s seminal 2012 debut Born To Die. The record changed my life- my rides to school became rides down the open road. Lana went on to influence nearly everything I do and consume artistically: persona first. With the amount of time I spend singing Lana absent-mindedly around the house, it would only make sense that I’d form an insane cover band. “This Is What Makes Us Girls” always stuck out to me as such a special song– a beautiful, conflicted, scared, strong swan song that turned out to be only the beginning.

Serenity Holland

“The Way It Was” by The Killers

I first heard this song as a piano ballad covered by an American Idol contestant, Cassandra Coleman, and it instantly evoked this notion that I needed something to cry about in order to fully appreciate it. The lyrics mourn a past love and capitalize on a certain reminiscence only heartbreak can yield. I have never experienced heartbreak, so why did I feel these lyrics in my chest? I think about every memory I wish I could still live in, and every liberty I wish I could still take. I think about everything I simply can not have anymore. When I listened to the original version, I realized this is a song for anyone and everyone. The outbreak of the drums emphasize the triumph of experiencing love in the first place. The playful guitar riff symbolizes this satirical aspect of life being that we tend to find appreciation for a moment after it ends. The repetition of the line “maybe a thief stole your heart,” is the ironic bitterness we hold for a person we crave deeply at the same time. Covering this with live musical elements present, and the personal sentiment attached to the song would surely send me flying.

Everly Orfanedes

“Everyday is a Winding Road” by Sheryl Crow

First of all, love the funky beat. Sheryl Crow’s “Everyday Is A Winding Road” is riddled with a variety of country twang, alternative lead guitar riffs, and a full, energetic band. There is nothing particularly complex about the lyrics in this song, but there is something so fun about getting up on a stage and just playing a song to feel the music in your feet and sway alongside the melody. I find that lyrically simple songs are sometimes the best to play with a full band. Song’s like “Everyday Is A Winding Road” allow for the music to take over, and any deeper thoughts to fade into the back of your mind. Usually, it’s just me and my guitar, and my devastating campfire, four chord songs, but when I’m playing with a band, it’s all about getting into a rhythm and tightness with the rest of the players.

Isabelle Pan

“Misery Business” by Paramore

If I had a cover band I know for a fact that the only songs I would sing would be emo music from the 2000s because, genuinely, that includes the most fun songs you can find. And if you didn’t have an emo phase, you truly have never lived properly. My mom raised me on this genre of music, so I do have some emotional connection to it, and this song specifically is so good. Although the song's meaning might be slightly questionable, I think it would be a cathartic experience to scream this with a group of people. And while I don’t think anyone could ever properly cover Hayley Williams vocals, I can die trying.

Nel Blinman

“Nobody’s Hippie” by Kimya Dawson

Alright, not to flex my indie status, but I started listening to Kimya Dawson in fifth grade. Still, I somehow didn’t hear “Nobody’s Hippie” until earlier this year. Once it made its way into my Spotify library, though, I played it practically non-stop for months. Grandpa Kimya is one of the only artists who speaks to my specific breed of lonely. They creep into my subconscious and lodge their little poetic hooks in there and refuse to leave. Sure, maybe I wouldn’t need a whole band for this song, but picture this: Dykes4Dawson. Folk instruments only. Don’t tell me that wouldn’t be great. Besides, Kimya Dawson is probably the only artist whose style suits my crackly T-boy voice, and I’ve always been a sucker for some convoluted lyrics. I can only hope that this song warms and cools and coddles your heart like it does mine.

Charlie Deitchman

“Not Strong Enough” by boygenius

Being my favorite band of all time, it only makes sense that if I were to be a part of a cover band we would specialize in only performing Boygenius songs. I think that they are one of the best bands that are currently around and the embodiment of friendship. “Not Strong Enough” is the song of theirs that has spoken to me, personally, the most, and though I could not come anywhere close to boygenius’ performance of this song, I can picture myself up on stage with two of my best friends repeatedly screaming “Always and angel, never a god.”