Playlist: pov it’s spring break but all you did was drive aimlessly around your hometown

Graphic by Chloe Williams

By Izzy Desmarais

After seven long weeks of sitting in classes that make me rethink all of my life choices, eating Emerson College’s less than satisfactory dining hall cuisine, and walking down the cold, gray streets of Boston, Spring Break has arrived. And with it came the promise of eating my mother’s beef stew for dinner, sleeping in my own bed, and driving my beloved 2010 blue Honda Civic, Gert. That’s right, I didn’t even have those extravagant Spring Break plans like that old MTV show set on some Florida beach littered with drunk college students. I live just an hour south from school, and I fortunately have the privilege of going back home any weekend I want to. Yet  I could not wait to fall back into a comfortably monotonous routine with absolutely no responsibilities for an entire week. As Spring Break comes to an end, I’ve decided to compile a playlist of all the songs I bumped on the daily while driving Gert around the pothole infested streets of Fall River, Massachusetts. 

“Lost Track” - HAIM 

I have listened to this song at least once a day since it came out on March 1st. With a dreamy, vibraphone heavy melody paired with a pulsing bassline, “Lost Track” packs a punch. You can easily scream along to the lyrics, especially when it picks up during the chorus. Lyrically, the song tackles the numbness that comes with being trapped in a situation you would do anything to get out of. It alludes to feeling burnt out and losing focus on what really matters, whatever that may be for someone. It’s definitely something I can relate to, especially after struggling through midterms. The refrain - “I’ll never get back what I lost track of” - perfectly encapsulates these emotions, specifically the hopelessness one may feel after a particularly challenging time. 

“Box of Rain” - Grateful Dead 

I have talked a lot of smack about the Grateful Dead in my day. Their songs are too long, there isn’t nearly enough singing, it’s just mumbo jumbo jam band nonsense that easily turns into background noise, etc. etc. Despite this previous attitude I had towards their music, I decided to write my Honors research paper on the Grateful Dead because (A) they were born out of an especially interesting time in American history that I enjoy reading about and (B) I really do admire Jerry Garcia as a person. As I listened to American Beauty for strictly analytical purposes, I couldn’t help but fall in love. I definitely prefer their studio albums to live recordings, which I know is sort of sacrilege in the Deadhead community, but my dad is  just happy I’ve finally come around to them. “Box of Rain” is another dreamy tune to follow “Lost Track,” but is more folk driven with acoustic guitars, steady drums, and a fun bassline. Bassist Phil Lesh sings lead vocals for this track, and his slightly off key singing just scratches a part of my brain that makes me think, “Damn, this is a great song,” every time I listen. 

“Blister In The Sun” - Violent Femmes

With clunky guitar and exaggerated vocals, “Blister In The Sun” is an early ‘80s classic that you can’t help but sing along to and gets stuck in your head so easily. It reminds me of my mom and her sisters, immediately taking me back to our family reunion nearly three summers ago where all five of them goofily danced along to this song. It’s already such an upbeat and happy song, but this memory just emphasizes it for me. This time, you’re not screaming the lyrics out of frustration and relatability to depressing lyrics, but because you’re having fun. 

“Franklin” - Paramore 

Slowing things down with this angsty track off of Paramore’s debut album, All We Know Is Falling, “Franklin” epitomizes the painful kind of nostalgia you feel when you come back home for the first time in a long while. While the line “Everything has changed” likely refers to Williams’ newfound fame and success as a pop-punk superstar, us listeners can still relate. Home lacks that certain je ne sais quoi now that you’re older. It’s not as comfortable as it once was. The places you loved as a kid don’t have that same spark anymore. It’s just, for lack of a better word, blah. Now you’re back to screaming along in frustration. 

“Imposter Syndrome” - Sidney Gish 

Sidney Gish’s stunning voice once again scratches the part of my brain that makes me think, “Damn, this is a great song.” Specifically with the line, “‘What’s a human being gotta be like? / What’s a way to just be competent?’” I don’t even have a deep connection to it, I just love the way Gish sings the word “competent” with a lack of emphasis on the “t” sounds.

“Ribs” - Lorde

While “Franklin” puts more emphasis on returning to your hometown and wondering where all its childhood magic went, “Ribs” focuses on emotional growing pains and wishing you could just go back to being a kid. I struggle with these feelings a lot as a freshman in college, and I’m sure a lot of other people my age do, too. Living in a big city and going to school, I feel so much older than I did last year and I’m not sure how to feel about it. At the same time, I still have a long way to go, which is somehow even scarier - “It feels so scary / Getting old.” When I was younger, I couldn’t wait to grow up, but now I kind of hate it - “This dream isn’t feeling sweet.” This is definitely the song that makes me rethink all of my life choices, so much so that I almost have to pull into a random parking lot and take a breather. But it still slaps, though. 

“Under My Skin” - Briston Maroney

Briston Maroney has that classic, ever so slightly whiny indie boy voice that makes every art school student swoon. “Under My Skin” is such a simple song, but I think that’s why it’s so addicting. It’s hard not to bang your head along to the drums as you pass someone who thinks it's okay to go 55MPH on the highway. 

“Never Going Back Again” - Fleetwood Mac

I know that this song is about Lindsey Buckingham’s tumultuous relationship with Stevie Nicks and finding a rebound after their breakup, but the lyrics are just vague enough that I can apply it to any feelings of disillusion. The finality of the line “Never going back again” resonates with the fears of growing up touched upon in “Franklin” and “Ribs.” Soon enough, my first year of college will be over and done with. Nothing will be brand new again until I’m a real adult with a real job who has real things to worry about. There’s no turning back now. It’s a deeply depressing song, but they mask these lyrics behind an intricate acoustic guitar riff, making it a much easier pill to swallow. 

“Dig A Pony” - The Beatles

Both my father and my best friend are currently on a Beatles kick, so I’ve heard a lot of Let It Be as of late. A handful of these songs have no real rhyme or reason as to why I put them on this playlist, they’re just fun to listen to while driving and “Dig A Pony” is one of them. Lennon himself said that he was “just having fun with words” and that it’s really “a nonsense song.” It’s mellow, has some great harmonies in the chorus, and an incredible guitar solo. I mean, what else can I say? It’s The Beatles, man. They’re fucking amazing. 

“Telescope” - Cage The Elephant

Unlike the other overtly sad songs on this playlist, “Telescope” offers a glimmer of hope amidst its feelings of doubt and anxiety - “Time is like a leaf in the wind / Either it’s time well spent or time I’ve wasted / Don’t waste it.” Yes, I know it’s just barely positive, but I still think it offers a valuable message. Plus, it picks up at the end and you can scream along in a way that energizes you, making you excited for what’s to come in life rather than dwelling on the scary parts. 

“Something In The Way” - Nirvana

Okay, I lied, I did have one very big plan for my Spring Break and that was going to see the 2 o’clock matinee of The Batman at Picture Show on Tuesday. I have never been a fan of superhero movies, but this movie was nothing short of incredible and it’s not just because Robert Pattison is drop dead gorgeous with that smudged eye makeup. Anyways, this isn’t a film publication, so let’s talk about the music! “Something In The Way” by Nirvana plays at the beginning and end of the film. It’s dark, it’s ominous, it’s moody - it perfectly encapsulates both Bruce Wayne’s internal struggle and the deeply corrupt Gotham City. So, since this movie is all I will be thinking about for the next week and a half, I of course had to add this song to the playlist. 

“News to Me” - Grouplove

Before writing this article, I could not tell you what singer Christian Zucconi was really saying in this song. I mean, I knew the lyrics enough to sing along, but I never tried to understand them. Like a lot of Grouplove’s songs, the lyrics are funny and kind of meaningless. This one opens with a verse introducing a sophisticated Englishman wiping his nose and frying up some breakfast and sitting in the bathtub. Then, when you get to the chorus - “If you're living for something, something yeah / Then you might have it all” - it touches on the importance of having a purpose, something that makes you happy and is worth living for. It doesn’t belabor that point, though. It’s just kind of thrown in there. 

“The Funeral” - Band of Horses

This is without a doubt Band of Horses’ most popular and most iconic song. That opening guitar riff immediately captures your attention and never fails to give me chills. It’s kind of creepy and dissonant, but at the same time sounds effortlessly cool.

“Chicago Is So Two Years Ago” - Fall Out Boy

Another pop-punk classic that reminisces on the band’s hometown, but this one is not nearly as depressing as “Franklin.” In typical early Fall Out Boy fashion, it’s likely about a girl who broke Pete Wentz’s heart. I adore how every single song off Take This To Your Grave manages to say “fuck you” in some way, shape, or form without ever explicitly saying it. As per usual, the bridge slaps you in the face with scathing lyrics: “You want apologies, girl, you might hold your breath / Until your breathing stops forever, forever / The only thing you'll get is this curse on your lips / I hope they taste of me forever.” Ouch. 

“Everybody Lost Somebody” - Bleachers

Do not let the jazzy saxophone solos lull you into a false sense of security - this song is anything but relaxing. Centered around the grief one experiences after losing a loved one, “Everybody Lost Somebody” is one of Jack Antonoff’s most vulnerable tracks. It was one of the first songs he wrote for his second studio album, Gone Now, and sets the tone with themes of love and loss. It’s a complex rollercoaster of emotions, from the slow introduction to a passionate chorus and subdued, yet reflective end. The line “I gotta get myself back home soon,” which is repeated throughout the album, hits hard for me in the same way “Franklin” and “Ribs” do. 

“Philosophy” - Ben Folds Five

In all honesty, I am never not bumping “Philosophy” by Ben Folds Five. It’s such a happy song for me and reminds me that everything is going to be alright, especially after the pity party I just had for myself at the beginning of this playlist. I feel like a lot of us struggle with wanting to please others, myself included, but this song sort of tells you to forget that and just stick to your guns. Follow your own philosophy, no matter how silly it may seem to others. Also as long as it doesn’t, you know, cause you or anybody else harm, obviously.